(A New, If Occasional, Segment)
Wear high heels to the Farmer's Market and use as many plastic bags as possible.
Oh, and Jesus saves. Today! If you're into that stuff.
Plus one correction: apparently there is so little crime in Irvine that they do not have a city jail. Therefore, the next time the overly-assiduous bag sheriff catches me saving plastic, he can send me to do hard time in Santa Ana. That's where the airport is. The John Wayne Airport. There is a big statue of him there. I always wanted to have my picture taken with it, but there is no one but the car rental people to snap the shot and they're on the clock, as they say. Plus there is that colossal American flag. But seriously, folks. Stagecoach! Hatari! This is the stuff of my youth...
Of course, so is Jesus. And I don't believe everything they say about him anymore either.
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